Written a couple of months ago….

I hear a pounding drum
And then I realize
It’s not a drum I hear
But my own pounding heart 

Fear
Like bile
Rises in my throat
And my stomach muscles clench 

Loneliness
And Desperation
Have become second nature
Just like breathing 

Silent screams
Echo in my brain
But I never dare
To let them out 

But then it gets too much
Too much to bear
And I crumble
Under the weight 

Sometimes I think
It’s going to kill me
Sometimes I wish
It truly would 

For if you don’t love me
And you don’t care
Then what worth
Does this life have?